I think it’s a little weird that I’ve been at my new job for two months, and I haven’t ‘officially’ told my coworkers that I’m gay.
It’s not that I think they would care. It just legitimately hasn’t come up. Without a partner to drop into the conversation (‘me and my boyfriend went to Potsdam this weekend’), it’s really difficult to mention your homosexuality without seeming like you’re making a Major Announcement.
I was wishing all week that my boss would ask me what I got up to in London, so I could mention ‘I went to Gay Pride’ (possibly adding ‘and it was fabulous!’ just to make it crystal clear). But it didn’t come up argh.
So now I’m left with two choices: Either wait for an opportunity to present itself organically (‘I’m leaving work early today; I need to buy poppers before the dungeon closes’), or pedantically announce it to my colleagues directly.
Tell them a good story featuring an ex-boyfriend in some way… or tell them how OMG hot your new Dr. is… or just leave it… I wouldn’t know what to answer if somebody announced their gayness (or straightness or any other preferences) at work… I really don’t wish to know all that much about other people’s sex life (unless it involves myself obviously), so I expect the Major Announcement would just get a bit awkward…
Aren’t there bracelets or ear rings or backpack-stickers that’ll send the right signal? or is that too tasteless?
Assless chaps on casual day?
I’m curious to know your thoughts about why you feel the need to tell them – if you don’t mind sharing them. 🙂 I’m polyamorous myself and feel the same need to tell people, but I’m not sure why. Perhaps it’s to avoid awkward moments when using terms like “one of my boyfriends” or something like that … (But I wrote a book about it, so usually I get to tell people in a pretty natural way when they ask what I do).
I remember being in a conversation once with a gay acquaintance and a guy who didn’t know, and that guy made some joke to the gay guy referring to “the wife”. He didn’t correct him. That felt pretty odd.
I don’t really care for knowing whether people are gay or not. The way I usually find out is that it slips into some conversation presupposed, and mostly just make a mental note and continue the conversation. It doesn’t really matter that much at all, unless there’s outlook on a romantic relationship or something.
Fun fact: When I started reading your blog years ago, it took me a few weeks to figure out you´re gay. No entries like this one at the time I suppose.
Do you know about any of your co-workers’ defined sexualities? Maybe they’re all gay!