Seattle is objectively superior to the place you grew up.
Three mountain ranges, four lakes and a fucking Sound. That’s a geographical feature your hometown hasn’t even heard of.
These buildings are made from the compacted dust of the City Halls of every other city on the planet, and symbolize Seattle’s undisputed domination over them.
The ground floor of that church is a Starbucks. Which Seattle invented.
This was taken at noon. We don’t even have daytime. Just sunset, 12 hours per day.
If you wave your arm from the top of the Space Needle, all the waterskiers will get out of your photo.
Bellevue, our eastern suburb. Every single one of those buildings is a mall. People who have a Bellevue stamp in their passports aren’t allowed into Seattle.
You’re only allowed to move away if you sign a non-disclosure agreement promising not to tell anyone how perfect it is.
Ferries, motherfucker. Yeah, that’s how we get to 7-11.
In the ’60s, the federal government tried to confiscate this mountain range under the principle that it’s not fair for one city to have so much view.
All of our pizzas are delivered by seaplane.
We also use them to drop hot dogs on football fans like rice on famines.
See that green space at the bottom of the lake? Microsoft paid for that shit. Our city government is so efficient that billionaires provide all of our public goods.
Seattle is so generous it built a whole synagogue for its six Jews.
Our World’s Fair was so amazing that Seattle is still listed in the thesaurus as a synonym for The Future.
We held an Olympics the same year, but it was so amazing that everyone agreed never to tell the rest of the world about it.
Abandoned gasworks, yeah boooy. The arsenic tainting our lakewater is thicker and more rainbow-colored than yours.
Seattle invented bricks and mortar in the 5th century BC. Then in the 20th century AD, it invented Amazon.com and made them obsolete.
The sun is literally always shining. Those clouds were artificially pumped in because there were out-of-towners visiting and we didn’t want them to stay .
In the ’70s, Seattle’s mayor ordered the curvature of the earth to be flattened here so residents can always see the mountains.
See how there’s nobody biking? Seattle traffic is so generous and efficient that a woman sued the city in the ’80s because it took her more than 7 minutes to get to work.
Seattleites are so inherently well-informed that we decided we didn’t need more than one newspaper to tell us what’s going on in the world.
This is a totem we erected to protect us from Courtney Love.
It’s illegal to serve food in Seattle without a waterfront view. Inland residents regularly starve to death.
Our port is so productive and our people so content that all the union dock workers have voluntarily left for lower-paying jobs.
We shop exclusively at the Pike Place Market. Fish can only be consumed if they’ve been thrown into an old newspaper.
Our library is big enough to service everyone in Seattle who can read.
It was designed and built in complete secrecy. If the governor, mayor or city council had found out about it, they would have blocked it for being creative and aesthetically pleasing.
They have never been allowed inside, obviously.
Our municipal court is so pleasing and efficient that people regularly spend months there before trial because they enjoy it so much.
All that corn that keeps Americans so lithe and healthy arrives here. Seattleites subsist entirely on smoked salmon and cougar-meat.
The bodies of the new Boeing 787 Dreamliner en route to Xzibit’s house to be pimped.
Bill Gates had this mountain installed outside of his house. When he claps twice, the sun goes down.
Those clouds are made from the vapor of 3 million cappuccinos.
It’s true: From far away, your hometown is less ethereal and photogenic than mine.
Seattle could teach you, but it would have to charge.
Actually it does, over in Fremont, there is also an old rocket mounted on a building there and up under the nearby bridge we have a friendly troll with his very own car.
I used to live in Bremerton and Olympia, Washington, and I now live temporarily in a suburb within a crappy long commute to DC. Nobody cares about the statues of the people in DC who wrote the legislation because there’s so much litter everywhere, and so much behind-the-scenes skeeziness that tourists never see. Run-down buildings, people living in poverty who are never visible to the visitors, graffitti, and a subway system that’s got the same filthy upholstery as when it was first implemented in the friggin ’70s. Seattle is still a city, true, with its definite underbelly, but Seattle is many magnitudes classier and more interesting than DC could ever hope to be. Since DC is the political seat of our nation, there’s a lot of garbage being hidden from the public that the government doesn’t want the world to see. We should move the capitol of our nation to Seattle so that we can all resemble human beings once more. %^)
I’m using some of that leftover Seattle/Olympia chill to tolerate living near DC until I can get back to the west coast. Six months until my permanent evacuation. No more lame-ass Maryland, no more gross DC. No more east coast. You guys can have it! %^)
LOVE it!!! Also living in Seattle currently I LOVE it. I am originally from SO Cal and thought I wouldn’t make it but the pictures shown are just a fraction of the unbelievable beauty here, but excellent job on capturing the pics even still. Oddly my husband just got a job opportunity in DC and we considered it for a moment….Can’t wait to show him this tonight. Totally agree with moving the capitol of our nation to Seattle too! Nothings perfect but it’s gotta be better than what we have today, right?!?!?!?
I think that comment was a joke, laurierose. I think some of the others may have been jokes as well. I could be wrong, of course. I mean, the ground floor of that other church IS a Starbucks, after all.
(Has anyone mentioned the Lenin statue yet, incidentally?)
Can you please clarify why Portland is better than Seattle? I have to inquire because I have a few friends who have either lived in Seattle or are originally from Seattle, and they have told me that Portland would be a better city for me than Seattle.
Portland is not better than Seattle. Which is probably why your friends think you should live there. But, don’t worry. Portland will contort itself to convince you that it’s better than Seattle. And you’ll believe it. I know this because you even had to ask.
Um, actually, I think Seattle has the largest Jewish population of any US city west of the Mississippi. Including any of the northern suburbs of Los Angeles.
Seattle is only cloudy due to the vapors of cappuccinos. That’s funny as Hell. I LOVE Seattle and miss it oh so much. I live in frickin Cheeseland now. WTF, I have never seen so many types of cheese and brats before in my life!!
Too funny about thecappucino vapors….in WI the vapors are from the local beer, cheese, and brat diet, yuk.
I spent my teen years in WA, my parents are still there and I visit as often as possible, to escape WI. Even with the rain and woman who don’t shave there’s always so much to do, and people are all pretty normal.
I live in WI now too (8 more years and my kid graduates and I’m out) and it sucks here, people here are there own special kind of crazy.
Those are *NOT* 787 fuselages on that railroad! 787 fuselages are entirely composite, and have no temporary protective coating (TPC) on them, and are delivered to Everett via what’s called “The Dream Lifter”! A VERY modified 747, and there’s four of them in the world! The only Boeing fuselages delivered here by railroad are 737’s…..
Oh I needed this laugh today! The weather is driving me mad. Gotta love the mountains, though. Don’t forget to mention that we have the alps only an hour away.
Ah Seattle bashing from Portlanders.. Being a Seattle native, I’ve always loved our little sister to the south, but really.. it’s kind of like “hey guys me too, right?” Yes Portland, you too. Stay weird. 🙂
Thank you for the best writeup about Seattle that I’ve ever seen. We’re moving soon (living fulltime in an RV), and this post will be a great reminder to look back on whenever I start missing it!
Question: Are there two giant, 300 foot statues of Jimi Hendrix and Bruce Lee (both of which are buried in the area) fighting Godzilla-Rodan style in downtown Seattle?
Answer: No, there are not.
Ergo, Seattle isn’t living up to Its potential and sucks.
This post is awesome and gave me maximum smiles and work-disrupting giggles. It’s so close to perfect that I have to make one of those nit-picky grammar corrections, so it can be truly, completely perfect. “Seattleites consist entirely on smoked salmon and cougar-meat.” Use ‘subist’ instead of consist as you cannot “consist on” anything. Tx again, LOVE THIS POST!
OK. Now. Lets be honest here. There are two serious issues with this post. 🙂
1) It’s worth mentioning that you took those beautiful photographs on one of the 30 days a year where it’s not raining and it’s clear enough that you can see past the end of the street and actually SEE that big volcano next door. So you’re engaging in a bit of false advertising. 🙂 Although, it’s pretty hard to beat Seattle though in summer. Almost impossible. No bugs. Never hot enough to need an air conditioner.
2) And secondly, you broke the Seattle “Fight-Club” Rule. You’re not supposed to tell people how wonderful it is. Then they move here and ruin it. Especially those ridiculous Californians — who already ruined their own state. 🙂 Tell them to go to Austin instead. :\
NEVER hot enough to need a/c? Not quite! The 2 weeks a year when you do need it, I was the happiest & most well-rested person at work every day because I paid extra to have it put in my house. No one else had slept for days because they were too hot and the stores were all sold out of fans. Worth every penny. I had people queuing to stay in my guest rooms every time we had a heatwave.
Spoken like a true Seattle native. As an Arizona native who spent a summer working in Seattle I can attest that it is a waste of money to buy an a/c. Of course, my co-workers did make fun of me for wearing a jacket to work everyday while I was there…so there’s that…
Having visited Seattle for PAX and having taken part in the Magical Mystery Tour there, I’m forced to agree that it is all true! The only bits that need adding are the Sci-Fi museum that has Red Dwarf and Dr Who, and the aquarium – both amazing! Manchester just cannot compare.
Although Seattle is awesome, its not all sugar and spice: it’s got it’s head lodged up its ass politically. And let’s talk about public transportion…oh yeah, we’re about 30 years behind on that…try getting anywhere without a car. Which brings up another point: our most horrible traffic. And that library?..try spending a day there and not get repulsed by the homeless crowd or getting lost in the corkscrew design.
You also forgot to mention the high suicide rate and the high number of serial killers from the area.
Our shit pro teams (except soccer) and the Starbucks CEO that let our NBA go to Oklahoma.
3 mountain ranges? Sorry, only there are only 2. The Cascades and Olympics. Those are still awesome though.
that’s not completely true either,
Most political problems are in Olympia
We don’t need public transportation because everything is delivered by plane
The library was designed that way to scare away the illiterate
The “homeless” are actually actors put there to ward off visitors
The suicide rate is only caused by people being told they had to leave Seattle permanently
Soccer (the REAL football) is the only sport played in the states professionally that is worthwhile anyway
and I am pretty sure you forgot to count the underwater mountain range in the puget sound…. so that makes 3.
Most voters are from Seattle (and surrounding metropolitan area). Your head is truly in the clouds if you think we don’t need a public transportation system.
No, the homeless are homeless, they’re worse than I experienced living in NYC.
While I like playing and watching Soccer (which I agree is the real football, I call american football “hand-egg”) I enjoy watching baseball and basketball live.
There is no Puget Sound mountain range. It is more a fjord system resulting from the last ice age. It runs primarily north-south, carved out as the last glaciers receded.
yes, now I am trolling. I have a strong love-hate relationship with this area. Something only one who lived hear for decades can understand.
Have to agree with this one, especially the political comment. It’s as if everyone purchases their pat political- and world-view from the same generic (NPR left) Stepford lifestyle shop (this “tolerant” city can be surprisingly hostile to any dissent from the lockstep, and it is eaten up with the cancer of political correctness). Of course, that’s probably true everywhere, the only difference being in the details and severity–I’d just expect more from Seattle since the populace is alleged to be more educated and intelligent there. Ah well, I love Seattle anyway, weather and all pro sports teams included.
Have you ever lived in another major city like LA, Chicago or New York? Because until you’ve experienced traffic in LA, or the homeless of New York, or the BS of Chicago politics, your views on all these awful things seem a bit provincial.
I grew up in the Chicago area, and moved to Seattle for a year and a half, just having moved back to Chicago for family reasons. I’ve also spent time in NYC and LA. While I was not in Seattle long enough to comment on the political side of things, it seemed like a pretty damned open-minded city. I lived in First Hill and hardly ever drove unless I was going to work on the Eastside…and if that’s what you’re talking about in terms of poor transportation…how do you propose they change that? Should they build a chunnel through Lake Washington? Or would you like a train that goes North or South of the lake?
As far as sports, the Seahawks have been pretty decent in recent years (despite this season) and the Sounders are AWESOME (about to get more awesome with new rivalries in Vancouver and Portland starting up). No comment on the Mariners.
Oh, and in terms of the suicide rate? They’re high, but not even close to the highest…35th out of 51 (including D.C.). Here’s the link: http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/go/state-ranking Turns out Utah is the most depressed state, and Nevada and Alaska are at the highest end of suicides.
This is brilliant. My favorite is the Bellevue caption, but the rest had me giggling. I sent this to my brother-in-law in Kansas just to make him weep.
That’s not the fuselage of the 787. Rather, it’s the 737 being shipped in via rail. 787 fuselages are built in one piece in Japan and are flown to the United States via the Dreamlifter, a modified 747 that can swallow the entire fuselage of its baby brother in one gulp.
I grew up in the NW and continue to live here, for now. Seattle is great but has MANY downfalls, most notibly is the absolutely AWFUL climate. 300 days of clouds a year, a constant drip. People are depressed often and rarely look on the bright side. (No pun intended.) I miss Denver, 300 days of sun, seasons…Mountains.
And then there are those of us who moved away from Denver TO Seattle to get away from the gawdawful constant, bright sunlight. It’s like constant laser beams into your brain.
I love the rain and clouds and it never makes me depressed, unlike everyone whining about how cloudy it is in the rainiest city in the country.
Seattle is better than my birthplace (Brooklyn) & the place I was raised (Miami) combined! I love this place! LUCID Jazz Lounge in the U-District has great LIVE Music for Free! Love it!
great pics—too bad most of the year these images are unseen due to the gloom and doom that is Seattle. I was there at Christmas and had to take refuge under an ultra bright lightbulb at the Seatac airport to get my Vitamin D levels up to something other sub zero. And Seattle IS my hometown (I now live on the E Coast). But seriously, great pictures.
Since this post comes out of the corner swinging, I’ll just have to respond back with a couple of swings of my own.
This is kind of a misleading post. Looks as if the photos were only taken during the non-raining season. So that means, this is what Seattle looks like 25% of the time.
Your music scene is lightyears ahead of the rest country and you have Uwajimaya but let’s not get carried away here. Better than the town I grew up in? I respectfully disagree. My 2 years in Seattle would have been better well spent in a dentist chair getting an x-ray of my mouth and have the technician come in and tell me, “We need to retake those”, for 730 days straight but instead I was forced to waste that time waiting for ferries.
That Jetson’s House, which I consider a scar on Seattle’s face, is one of the most hysterical landmarks I have ever seen. I half expected a scientist (lab-coat, clip board and all) to greet me outside the Space Needle and say “Welcome, to the AAAAAAMAZING FUTURE!” Your inability to make pizza, hotdogs or basically anything other than seafood is just mind-blowing. The common Seattleite’s inability to drive in the rain (you guys should really have a handle on that), some how grander inability to drive on a clear sunny day, and your “F*** IT, there’s a quarter inch of snow on the ground, better abandon my car on the interstate” driving technique is terrifying. The roads are modeled after a ball of tangled yarn and what the hell is with the injecting a named street in-between the numbered streets? You can only ride a bike in one direction (down hill) and if you want to get back you’ll have to grab a cab… BUT that’s impossible in the city of Seattle because there are only 6 of them in the entire city!
The only mode of transportation I enjoyed out there was the light rail. Because it took me directly out of Seattle and dropped me off at SEA-TAC. That NDA they tried to make me sign wasn’t necessary. I spit on it and said “Don’t you worry. I’ll actively tell people to never go there.”
In this post you should have posted a sound bite of a hipster scoffing at someone considering to eat bread that isn’t gluten free.
So enjoy your “superior hometown”. I’ll be having a grand old time in my home town Chicago. Riding my bike to and from places, not having that fear of being struck by a driver because “The sun was in their eyes”, eating some of the best food in the country and going to one of our many bars that doesn’t do last call at 12:30am. A place where the women keep their sweatpants at home and I can actually hail a cab.
Just a warning for any of you considering moving to this place. Don’t do it!!! You should definitely visit. Hike Rainier, hang in Ballard, eat some sushi but for the love of everything that is sacred in this world, DON’T LIVE THERE!!!
So, so true. I’m from Chicago, and lived in Seattle for a little while…when walking and riding those hills, I’d never felt so healthy and in shape! And his comment on food is pretty ridiculous, too. Yes, Chicago does have some world-class chefs and restaurants, but does it have late-night happy hour for food and drinks? And I have had more than a few friends get hit by riding their bicycles throughout Chicago. You’re lucky as hell if a road has a real bike-lane. This guy sounds like a pretentious yuppie from Lincoln Park or Old Town who works in the Financial District.
Seattleites can drive in the rain its the transplants that can’t.
Name another major city that has as many hills as us and gets snow.
With ya on the cabs and last call part….. lalalalame.
Seems like you wussed out, only the strong survive here.
plainly, that means you didn’t even live in seattle.
thus, you were targeted for non-admittance status during your brief term here.
you probably only got a d-level clearance – which means you never found our grass fed beef burger joints, our warm and dimly lit drinking nooks with world class bourbon offerings, and you most assuredly never pre-funked a yacht party before a huskies game.
this also explains why you, subsequently, spent 2 years looking, in vain, for a decent hotdog…
enjoy biking chi-town. minus 37 degrees is super fun…
A few thoughts…
Don’t be sour Chicago didn’t come up with the Needle. Soon Chicago will try and build one, only to learn that it will not ever meet the standards of Seattle’s genius.
Speaking of genius, have you had a Cream Cheese hotdog?
As far as pizza goes…you can take your monstrosity deep dish pizza along with high cholesterol and poor physique. Seattle flies pizza to Italy during shortages since we are the only ones who know how to make a true pizza.
Those bad drivers…not from Seattle.
Seattlites are in good shape…it takes a superior gene pool to be able to bike back up our hills.
Don’t be frustrated that you don’t understand the logic of our streets…soon Chicago will learn.
Seriously? You live in Chicago and you try and play this? I might have bought it if you lived in New York or Philadelphia or San Francisco, maybe but NOT Chicago — the place they call the Windy City? You can ride a bike there for the 7 days it isn’t so hot and humid you turn into a limp rag or cold and snowing that your bike chain freezes. Next time you want to go mano a mano with Seattle, change your hometown first!
Did we not server your latte at the right temperature? Such a bitter response. We’re proud of our quirky “little” city. Be proud of yours too, but don’t waste your time or ours bashing ours.
The only thing sadder than someone claiming that ” makes the best pizza in the world and it’s vastly superior to the pizza from “, is when ANYONE claims that Chicago style pizza is even “pizza”, much less edible.
Best I can figure is that some Bears fan (da’ Bears) decided that he couldn’t get fat enough eating an honest pizza, unless he added 20 layers of cholesterol based ingredients.
Chicago??Chicago!?! After spending the 3 worst years of my life in that hell hole I’ve never been happier in my life in Seattle. There are maybe 7 days a year you can actually go outside in Chicago…so unbelievably cold, way too hot in the summer and there is no such thing as fall or spring. I HATED it. I don’t own a car in Seattle and bike and use public transit to get around everywhere with no problem. This is the first January of my entire life that I’ve actually been able to go outside and go biking without nearly freezing to death. Oh yeh it’s cloudy? Boo hoo, the temperate is fantastic year round and the rain never gets in the way of any run or bike ride. I have yet to even use an umbrella. Seattle is the best!!
No one uses an umbrella….it’s Seattle. We leave that shit to the Portland hipsters and don our Marmot/Columbia/North Face/Patagonia/Mountain Hardwear/etc. raincoats in a variety of bright colors.
Yeah. About the Union Dock Workers. They actually went to Andy’s Diner to get “lunch” and never made it back to work. Oh how I miss Seattle. Pics are beautiful. Should be a coffee table book.
Except, I have to shame us a bit – truth is, our brother to the north, Vancouver, is just like us except slightly better in every way (except their university is uglier!).
Nahh! I posit that the two cities are in many ways very different; also, my opinion is that Seattle is in some ways better than Vancouver (for example, Vancouver’s built environment, i.e., architecture and streetscape, is *significantly* more generic and sterile throughout the city and suburbs).
Seattle and Vancouver may be nearly identical in size and climate, with some geographic similarities, but they have their own very distinct identities and specific characteristics and geographic details. People outside the region think of them as twins and don’t know the difference when the latter subs for the former in film and tv (Seacouver), but we all know better.
Both cities have pros and cons, and I’d say both come out equal if different in quality. But let’s not forget, both cities are bigger and better than Portland (nice little town, but why settle when you’re so close…).
(I don’t really have a beef with Portland, I just know they’re sensitive, kinda like Atlanta, the original useless, “me-too” city. Makes it fun to tweak them. At least Portland is a moderately desirable locale–Atlanta, not even remotely.)
Vancouver is actually a several magnitudes larger than Seattle. Nearly 4x the population at 2.3 million.
I like Portland. What Chicago is to New York, Portland is to Seattle, sorta (and more accurately; Seattle is to Vancouver). Geographically and environmentally similar, they differ on the social and economic level.
@go gadget go Vancouver’s population is 578,041 according to the 2006 Canadian Census, whereas Seattle’s is 608,660. You looked at the numbers for the Vancouver metropolitan area (Vancouver plus the surrounding suburbs) and compared them to the numbers for Seattle’s city limits. Seattle actually has a larger metropolitan area at 3.4 million. The disparity in census years discredits the 30,000 difference in population since in four years Vancouver could’ve easily gained that much. They’re roughly equal.
Um, yeah, this is fucking rad. I live in belltown and wouldnt leave this place for all the money in the world….instead, I would buy it, kick all the bums out, move all the buildings closer to the water and have awesome gatherings with the 5 million people I have yet to meet. Nice work on this.
Seattle averages less rain per year than New York City, New York City, Atlanta, Boston, Baltimore, Portland, Maine, and Jacksonville, Florida, and isn’t even on the list of top 15 rainiest cities in America.
It would be more awesome if you could simply get a decent pizza. Seriously, Pagliacci is dollar for dollar, the most overpriced food/quality product on the planet. I love virtually everything about Seattle, but am seriously stunned at how terrible the pizza is….
This blog is very un-Seattle like!!! You should be too cool to post something like this. Seattle folks know Seattle is better because they are enlightened beyond caring. Leave it for the junior high humor that exists in Portland.
Great photos of Seattle and the surrounding area but the photos of the Boeing planes are the 737 not the 787. The 787 is a composite body and is not green.
You forgot the Fremont Troll! No other city in the world has it’s *very own troll*, two stores tall and sitting under the Aurora ridge, eating a real Volkswagon bug!
No Portland hate please. Both cities are lovely. Vancouver B.C. is too. We should all have city-citizenship in all three regardless of which one it is that we call home. Seattle is bliss and so is Portland and Vancouver. San Francisco… not so much… but it has that crazy energy border towns have. 😛
But then everyone from both Portland and Seattle come to the Bay Area and find out quickly what they got wrong. We made y’all. YEEEEEEEE!!! Also, Seattleites have tried to tell me that they invented “hella.” Don’t be ignant.
You are correct. The NBA, least interesting pro sport, maintains a disproportionate presence in smaller, less significant markets such as PDX. Note, for example, they abandoned both Seattle and Vancouver, much nicer and more significant cities than Portland, for Oklahoma City and Memphis.
…BTW, “Shawn Kemp’s son”, have you met any of your countless half-siblings scattered all across this great land?!
Sheet, I realize this is a joke but some poor slob in Kansas is probably thinking this reaffirms her life goal to get to Portland or Seattle where everything will just click into order for her–naturally. To that slob I say be very wary of this part of the country. The people and the opportunities aren’t that great. Do some research and visit at various times of the year. My advice is go big first and then if you don’t like that go fizzle out out in the drizzle in the NW. Good Luck!
But someday maybe u should come visit Indonesia..
We don’t have a great big buildings and fabulous as your place but we have a wealth of nature that is so beautiful and amazing scenery that big city don’t have 🙂
Something that money cant buy or even build up..
But someday i should visit your hometown too.. To see how beautiful and great your hometown..
nice pic..
Seattle is the second best city in Washington. The best one is where the sun shines almost 270 days a year. It offers many of the amenities of Seattle other than the sound, but there are over 100 lakes within 30 miles of it. People still say hello to people they walk by on the streets. Traffic jams last 30 minutes in the morning and afternoon and they delay you for about 10 minutes at the most. You don’t need over $100K salaries to afford a decent home. Those of you that live in Washington will know the city I am talking about. I prefer to keep it a secret so it stays like it is.
Lived there once. Was not an experience I’d care to repeat, and lacked diversity in every respect. Sorry, Bill – Spokane’s just not for all of us (though you do have us beat on the traffic jam situation).
You gotta be joking me right? Spokane is a SH*t hole. What else do they have that seattle has? They have no jobs, no pride in home ownership, no self respect, no activities that Seattle doesn’t, no decent food.
There are NO 100k+ jobs there so I hope you dont need one to get by. Housing is supply and demand, housing is cheap there because nobody wants to live there, and even if they did want to, where would they work? Retail or fast food? Maybe construction? They also have more fast food per capita than any city in America, so there clearly aren’t a lot of good looking people either.
Me thinks you speak of Spokane, but only because of the first comment is derivative of the animosity that is common of eastern Washingtonians towards west. But I might be wrong.
Where else, he mentioned sunshine, all the other cities in Washington with “amenities” have nearly identical weather to Seattle being all clumped together along the sound.
I love the elk crossing sign (have never seen one there in 30+ years BWAAA) right before the sunniest city in Washington, and it’s on the way to my favorite place on the Olympic Peninsula, Sol Duc Hot Springs!!! My son and I took Flat Stanley there. FS chilled and had a cheeseburger at the grill – next to the 3 hot pools and one fabulous cold pool. Best back and forth temperature-torture you can put yourself through! Flat Stanley didn’t play that s**t though. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah…we were talking about Seattle. I digress…whew – I need a vente frappe, gonna go get one five minutes from home…in any direction. Oh, and GO HAWKS!!! And for you Bronco, 49ers. Ariz. Cardinals fans, South Kitsap Cheerleaders could kick all your butts!
Very nice photos. If I could convince my wife to move I would be gone in a minute. Seattle is overcrowded, way overpriced and the people are pretentious and rude. I have been here 25 years and that is about 24 years too long.
Agreed, I lived there for 18 years and had more than my fill. I’ll take the sunny Bay Area any day of the week. Seattle can have it’s yearly two weeks of absolutely beautiful weather, I’ll take my daily dose. Most Californians believe the hype, go ahead and move up there and enjoy your disappointment.
Oh, I completely agree. Seattle is a beautiful city, but in my nearly 9 years here I find the people to just be…bleh. I am a transplanted east coaster, so maybe I’m just used to friendlier people (even though everyone thinks we’re rude!). The Seattle freeze is definitely in effect here, and I don’t like it one bit. I’m established here now with my career and family, otherwise I’d leave in a heartbeat. The views would still be here when I came to visit, but I wouldn’t have to deal with boring, passive-aggressive people every day.
Since I moved here from NYC, I have hated Seattle with the fire of a thousand suns. I clicked through preparing to hate this, but it made me laugh until I fell down. I also now understand why I got brained with a hot dog a few months back. Y’all really ought to put something about that in the welcome packet.
Love the pictures. Love the captions. I am fortunate to live in one part of Seattle that is 15 minutes away from everything! From downtown, Ballard, Alki, Lake Washington, Boeing field, and the mall. Yeah, Seattle is wonderful and yeah, Seattle has its problems. Running a business is a challenge, traffic can be a huge issue, the weather is just something you get used to. We have the threat of earthquake but virtually no tornadoes, no hurricanes, summers not too hot and winters not to cold (usually-but as with everywhere there are exceptions to every rule.) When it does snow, yeah, it gets crazy-but you try to drive these hills in the snow, even with chains. And, because of the hills, mountains and convergence zones, it can literally be clear at my house and 1 mile up the street, be snowing. It is just the way it is. Seattle is wonderful. I believe this post was meant to brag about some things, and per the captions, bitch about some of the others. We are not perfect, we never claim to be, but we definitely have a lock on the best and most beautiful city in the Northwest.
Having left Seattle for NYC, I can confirm thid is true, you must sign a waiver when you leave. They also install a microchip into your brain just to be safe.
I wouldn’t be so braggy about Starbucks.
I wish that had been true about Bellevue-ites. You should create an initiative.
Gorgeous pics. Seattle is truly a beautiful place although it has nothing on NYC. I actually could get arrested from the post because it’s illegal to even allow the two in the same conversation, that’s how far apart they are in awesomeness.
You are becoming legen-(wait for it)-dary among my Seattle Facebook friends for this. Thanks for lots of chuckles! Our hyperbole in the Northwest is better than everyone else’s.
Some say Seattle-ites receive a monthly stipend from the Governor as a bonus for choosing to live here. But everyone refuses to accept the money because that would be crass. The 12-hours of sunset is enough.
Great post.
For the Accuracy-freaks coming out of the woodwork, I have four words for you: hy-per-bol-e. Sheesh.
Really. If you’re taking this seriously at all, you probably shouldn’t be allowed to live anywhere without a guardian. Born and raised in Seattle and love to visit, but sold my soul for SoCal sunshine.
Honestly, Seattle is super overrated. I went there once and not only was it raining but nobody had an umbrella to lend me! Have yet to navigate the downtown area without paying at least $7 in bus fare. Pretty mountains do not make a “good hometown”.
New York is like a rich loser who can’t get laid at home, so he has to pay for it at other places!!! “A-rod, Ichiro, Freddy Garcia, Raul” We still got the better end of the deal with Buhner. It’s ok you guys couldn’t get past 3rd base so you picked up Seattle’s sloppy seconds. Anytime you want to hop on one of Boeing’s planes and come visit our far superior city feel free. Just make sure you tell people “The Bone sent ya” or we might send you a little south to take a trip down the Green River.
And why is everyone hating on Tacoma, when we have those “horse whispers” up in Enumclaw. You sick Fucks. Seattle would be more than happy to buy your plane tickets to New York. Maybe their mounted police can give you a proper New York beating.
P.S. Bones
My truck payment is going to be a little late, do to the fact I somehow miss placed my wallet at Hempfest…
This type of smug, self absorbed arrogance is everything that’s wrong with Seattle. This kid has obviously never lived anywhere else or he would know that people on the East coast can’t point Seattle out on the map….cause they don’t care
.KEvery word is true!!! This is exactly why I love and miss Seattle!
(Posted from po-dunk Kentucky where they have no teeth, no education, no mountains 🙁 …and definitely nothing delivered by seaplane.)
My favorite is the noon photo with the reference to sunset all day long . . . . everyday, all day long . . . . for months . . . . and months. it’s abeautiful photo, though.
I lived in Seattle for 11 years…about 10 years too long! thank goodness for So. Cal sunshine!!! miss the green, some restaurants & my Seattle friends…but have facebook to stay in touch…enjoy the grey and the rain for me…give me SUNSHINE 360 days of the year!
Of course it looks nice! Those pics where taken on a rare sunny day! There is literally no sun and it really does rain all the time! So for that Seattle sucks and that is why I left! Especially being from CA. Sure if you are from there it doesn’t bother you- you don’t know anything else!
Seattle is my hometown and I love it; in all it’s pretentious, hyperbolic glory! 🙂 If you can’t take your coffee black and your skies grey you won’t like Seattle. She is quirky and cool, down-home snootsville and you’ve gotta love her for all her uniqueness and nonconventionality. Seattleites are a wacky bunch, but we can laugh at ourselves and our kookie kitsch.
Love and miss Seattle like a long lost lover… I appreciate the pictures and captions. Accuracy was not the target for this. Only getting a discussion going.
Yes Seattle is the absolute best. This post is for everyone I meet who says “ew, it rains a lot in Seattle” or “I’d be so depressing to live in Seattle” or “I hear that Seattle has a high suicide rate”.
was born in texas; moved everywhere; ended up in seattle for 6 years. been back nd forth between seattle; texas; and los angeles….cali is warm…. but way more busy than my home. ive been in seattle the longest outta every state and city ive lived in; and i jus turned 21. seattle is a great place for life options.
As an ex-pat from the Pacific Northwest, I LOVED this! Thank you so much. It made me homesick!
To the haters- If you can’t take a joke or understand hyperbole, we’re glad you left and are never coming back.
I’m living in a gorgeous Italian city now, and yet, I still think the beauty of our city rivals some of the better known most beautiful places in the world. On a clear summer day, when the water is shining, and the trees are lush, and the mountains are out – I think it is hard to find anywhere more beautiful. Maybe as beautiful, but not more. Thanks!
I’ve been to 18 different major cities in the U.S. and lived in 5 of them. All of these place were somewhat nice but, none of them come close to Seattle as far as I’m concerned.
These pictures clearly explain why my girlfriend is merciliessly asking that we move to Seattle. Apparently,she believes that Seattle > NYC, and after seeing your pics and reading your descriptions (lakes and mountain ranges!), she may have a valid point. Thanks for posting the pictures, and allowing her arguments to creep evermore into my head.
As a native of Philadelphia, I think it’s cute how other cities think they are superior to us. 🙂 However, I do have to say that I did visit Seattle for a work conference recently and thought that the downtown was quite nice … except for the freezing rain that fell EVERY DAY and was so cold that it quite literally froze my internal organs on the inside my body. It took a few cups of overpriced sugary coffee to thaw them before I could bend in the middle. I suppose that’s why you invented the stuff …
Philly doesn’t even compare to Seattle. You just happened to visit during an unusual time, because they don’t usually have freezing rain, and certainly not everyday!. Where did you get your coffee from anyway, because they do have good coffee just about everywhere you go. Maybe you just don’t know how to order coffee???
Hahaha this is a fantastic post. I particularly liked “Seattle invented bricks and mortar in the 5th century BC. Then in the 20th century AD, it invented Amazon.com and made them obsolete.” and “Those clouds are made from the vapor of 3 million cappuccinos.”
Well done and congrats on FP.
NB. I’d just like to say that I like MY hometown too! xx
I am from Toronto, and visited a friend in Seattle this past November. I only spent 4 days there, but I did fall in love with it. Being an avid-coffee drinker, I was impressed with the sheer volume of coffee shops. I could have spent the entire duration of my trip at Pike Place, and I almost did. I’ll be back in February, so we’ll see if it’s as magical the second time around!
Last August I left Seattle after 15 years – back to Chicago. What the hell was I thinking?! Lived in NW Capitol Hill, worked in Eastlake – walked to work everyday with a Space Needle, Olympics, Queen Anne, seaplane, Lake Union, houseboats and sailboats backdrop. Sometimes, here on the prairie I squint my eyes and imagine clouds are mountains. I actually go to Starbucks here, never did in Seattle – makes me feel close.
I’m coming back to you soon my love! You’re in my bones. This is a lovely (and also for me, somewhat heartbreaking) post.
I had the same feeling after I left Seattle (lived there for seven years) and moved back to New England. I actually had dreams about Seattle I missed it so much. Corny, I know, but it really was like a heart-breaking split with a lover.
LMFAO…i like this post and found it entertaining, even though I’ve never been to Seattle and would never bother going there (a place where it rains every day?No thank you!!)
…BTW, my hometown boasts a 7-11 with a waterfront view, a main street that ends in a harborfront with mega-yachts, one traffic light and one of the best-restored collection of colonial houses in the country. 🙂
My hometown not only has a sound. A king called Frederik decided it was so awesome, he named it after himself: Frederikss(o)und.
Apart from that we have nothing.
Sorry, no sun. ‘Nuff said
Shut Up Luke….that’s just what we want you to think.
My hometown (which I moved to 2 years ago from California) is better than yours.
No mention of Jimi Hendrix? He’s buried in Renton, but still…
Great job on the pics.
Hendrix was a Rentonite?
The shame ….
Your pictures make your hometown city look so cool! I now want to visit Seattle.
Love this. Bet you’d like http://www.putaplaneonit.com. Go Jet City!
Washington D.C. has statues of people that wrote legislation. Seattle has a statue of Jimi Hendrix.
Probably should have been a picture of that in this post. Obviously its another reason why Seattle rules.
Damn straight Seattle does.
Seattle also has a statue of Lenin.
*headdesk*
No it doesn’t.
Actually it does, over in Fremont, there is also an old rocket mounted on a building there and up under the nearby bridge we have a friendly troll with his very own car.
And the Lenin statue is WAY bigger than the Hendrix one.
And the center of campus at UW is called Red Square.
Seattle even has a statue of Seattle
I loled.
And a sweet troll…under a bridge…eating a vw beetle…
Seattle even has statue of Lenin!
Seattle even has a Statue of Liberty… at the beach!
New York City liked it so much, they copied it in 1886.
We also have a statue of Lenin, which is in Fremont, at the center of the universe.
Seattle, home of the center of the universe.
Don’t forget that we also have the Weedle on the Needle!
I have never heard of this… But it is a gen or two before my time I guess.
Seattle also has a miniature Statue of Liberty!
Washington DC also has all of the countries debt to China.
Legislation is overrated.
Who’s point are you trying to make? 😉
uh… WIN seattle.
… thus proving that Seattle totally RAAAWKS!! Dude!!
Don’t forget that Bruce Lee went to UW and is buried here.
We have a statue of Lenin also.
…and Lenin (at Fremont)!
I used to live in Bremerton and Olympia, Washington, and I now live temporarily in a suburb within a crappy long commute to DC. Nobody cares about the statues of the people in DC who wrote the legislation because there’s so much litter everywhere, and so much behind-the-scenes skeeziness that tourists never see. Run-down buildings, people living in poverty who are never visible to the visitors, graffitti, and a subway system that’s got the same filthy upholstery as when it was first implemented in the friggin ’70s. Seattle is still a city, true, with its definite underbelly, but Seattle is many magnitudes classier and more interesting than DC could ever hope to be. Since DC is the political seat of our nation, there’s a lot of garbage being hidden from the public that the government doesn’t want the world to see. We should move the capitol of our nation to Seattle so that we can all resemble human beings once more. %^)
Seattle’s my hometown. But DC isn’t really so bad. Use some of that left-over Seattle chill, man….
I’m using some of that leftover Seattle/Olympia chill to tolerate living near DC until I can get back to the west coast. Six months until my permanent evacuation. No more lame-ass Maryland, no more gross DC. No more east coast. You guys can have it! %^)
Funny, born and raised in Seattle, lived there for 35 years. Now we live in a suburb of DC, as well. I like DC but I love Seattle. 🙂
LOVE it!!! Also living in Seattle currently I LOVE it. I am originally from SO Cal and thought I wouldn’t make it but the pictures shown are just a fraction of the unbelievable beauty here, but excellent job on capturing the pics even still. Oddly my husband just got a job opportunity in DC and we considered it for a moment….Can’t wait to show him this tonight. Totally agree with moving the capitol of our nation to Seattle too! Nothings perfect but it’s gotta be better than what we have today, right?!?!?!?
About an hour into the suburbs you can find Jimi Hendrix gravesite…
Hendrix loved D.C. so much, he played the ballroom in the Washington Hilton 🙂
http://ghostsofdc.org/2012/01/08/hendrix-plays-the-washington-hilton-1968/
Washington D.C. has statues of people that wrote legislation…..
elsewhere.
Love these pics & commentary. So Seattle….
Those airplane fuselages are not 787s, they are 737s.
yeah, I saw that. lame. oh well. this post still rocks.
We have a monopoly on those too……
Seattle, where the general citizenry can identify fuselages, and will point out your mistake.
only someone from seattle could tell the difference between 787 and 737 fuselages!!
…and another correction: the Jewish community is larger than 6 and isn’t Episcopal in the least.
I think that comment was a joke, laurierose. I think some of the others may have been jokes as well. I could be wrong, of course. I mean, the ground floor of that other church IS a Starbucks, after all.
(Has anyone mentioned the Lenin statue yet, incidentally?)
Portland is better.
Sucka.
Portland is Seattle Jr.
Everyone in Portland is perpetually slightly upset and gruff (because they aren’t in Seattle)
Junior?! Portland is Seattle’s punk ass little brother. Much littler brother.
Portland is our baby sister
Ha – *we* are little brother? What a Portland thing to say.
Nah, Portland is that strange uncle no one wants to talk about.
lol! PDX is more like the Seattle’s red-headed step child!
LOL!!!! Seattle, Jr.!! So true and so funny.
Portland is totally our mini me.
Portland, where young people go to retire….
Seattle, where those confused youngsters return to get real jobs
You do know why all the trees in Seattle lean towards Portland, right?
Cause they are addicted to Meth and Heroin?
portland sucks donkey balls
Put a bird on it.
Portland? I’ve heard of that. Is it some place in Maine?
Finally, someone making sense. The part about Seattle traffic being good? BULLSHIT!
Portland is like San Francisco….. If San Francisco quit its day job to focus on its music.
And picked up the requisite drug problem and STDs, yes.
Can you please clarify why Portland is better than Seattle? I have to inquire because I have a few friends who have either lived in Seattle or are originally from Seattle, and they have told me that Portland would be a better city for me than Seattle.
Portland is not better than Seattle. Which is probably why your friends think you should live there. But, don’t worry. Portland will contort itself to convince you that it’s better than Seattle. And you’ll believe it. I know this because you even had to ask.
Go West Seattle
That’s a cathedral, not a synagogue.
I had that same thought. St. Mark’s Cathedral on Capitol Hill, right?
yes… it’s St. Mark’s, I went to a free spaghetti feed in the basement there once.. it too was delivered by seaplane.
it is indeed St. Mark’s Episcopal Church
Yes, that’s the Episcopal Cathedral on Capitol Hill, I believe.
Absolutely — St Mark’s — went there for years. Lovingly called the “Holy Box”.
The fact that there are more or less six Jews in Seattle is one reason why Seattle is SO NOT the place to be.
Um, actually, I think Seattle has the largest Jewish population of any US city west of the Mississippi. Including any of the northern suburbs of Los Angeles.
I believe that’s part of the joke.
These pictures are funny, not a documentary, right?
That’s also the federal court, not the municipal court.
That’s the defunct Federal Court. The real one is a new building at 8th/Stewart.
That’s the Appeals Court. Federal Courthouse is 7th and Stewart
and we also don’t sky-drop hot dogs.
Portland is weird and is stuck in a time warp from the 90s. Seattle is far better.
Yes, and I believe, good sir, only 87% of our pizzas are delivered by seaplane. You are not representational!
Jeez guys, have you heard of hyperbole?
Seattle is only cloudy due to the vapors of cappuccinos. That’s funny as Hell. I LOVE Seattle and miss it oh so much. I live in frickin Cheeseland now. WTF, I have never seen so many types of cheese and brats before in my life!!
Oh Man, I moved from Wisconsin to Seattle. I miss all that cheese. 🙁
But I do really like seattle too.
I had to come back to Chicago from Seattle, so I feel your pain. Nothing but flatland and frozen ponds that people call lakes. *sigh*
Too funny about thecappucino vapors….in WI the vapors are from the local beer, cheese, and brat diet, yuk.
I spent my teen years in WA, my parents are still there and I visit as often as possible, to escape WI. Even with the rain and woman who don’t shave there’s always so much to do, and people are all pretty normal.
I live in WI now too (8 more years and my kid graduates and I’m out) and it sucks here, people here are there own special kind of crazy.
now that is some funny stuff! HA! Thanks for the snorts and chuckles.
SO BRILLIANT.
But you forgot to mention that we also have the grave of BRUCE-FRICKIN-LEE, who undoubtedly protects us in his ethereal state.
But seriously, this was the highlight of my morning. Bravo!
Those are *NOT* 787 fuselages on that railroad! 787 fuselages are entirely composite, and have no temporary protective coating (TPC) on them, and are delivered to Everett via what’s called “The Dream Lifter”! A VERY modified 747, and there’s four of them in the world! The only Boeing fuselages delivered here by railroad are 737’s…..
Aww this just shows how nerdy we are and why I love Seattle. Jay you are correct 🙂
And I bet they aren’t going to Xzibit’s house to be pimped out either. Whoever wrote this is a Goddamned liar!
oh come on now. let this be fun. dont ruin it for the rest of us because you are a grumpy gus!!
Was about to say the same thing.
When they get to Xzibit’s house he’s going to pimp them into 787’s. Then he’s going to deliver some pizzas.
in a seaplane.
Win.
Yep – 787 seaplanes
Totally true
Oh I needed this laugh today! The weather is driving me mad. Gotta love the mountains, though. Don’t forget to mention that we have the alps only an hour away.
seattle is my adopted hometown. forever.
Seems nice, but how is the rest of Oregon?
OREGON?
….Try again! Washington.
I’m gonna punch you right in the throat
Holy shit, I was literally laughing for 2 minutes straight from this reply. Well done. 🙂
I can’t tell if that’s supposed to be a burn or a sign of ignorance. Seattle is in Northern Washington. Oregon is a state southern to Washington.
Correction.
Seattle is in northern Washington. Oregon is a state IN southern Washington. 😉
Seattle is in Washington…
Well played. 😀
Much like Seattle, this article is totally awesome. Now I have to call in a seaplane for some pizza.
Seattle rocks. Portland sucks more than Tacoma. OK, that’s not fair. They’re tied.
Ah Seattle bashing from Portlanders.. Being a Seattle native, I’ve always loved our little sister to the south, but really.. it’s kind of like “hey guys me too, right?” Yes Portland, you too. Stay weird. 🙂
Love! Makes me proud!
Thank you for the best writeup about Seattle that I’ve ever seen. We’re moving soon (living fulltime in an RV), and this post will be a great reminder to look back on whenever I start missing it!
Seattle has a troll under a bridge!
its me
Question: Are there two giant, 300 foot statues of Jimi Hendrix and Bruce Lee (both of which are buried in the area) fighting Godzilla-Rodan style in downtown Seattle?
Answer: No, there are not.
Ergo, Seattle isn’t living up to Its potential and sucks.
Maybe there, and maybe there aren’t. If you’re not from Seattle, you don’t get to know.
Jimi Hendrix is buried in Renton
No, just a giant hammerin’ man. Who gets a ball and chain around his ankle from guerilla artists on Labor Day.
He used to always have a ball and chain. It was removed around the turn of the century (2000).
Oh, I was in Seattle then. That was epic. I miss Seattle. No, it didn’t always have the ball and chain. These kids today….
Jimi was a lover, not a fighter. Philistine.
The city council is trying to make this happen actually but can’t find a design that is good enough to capture exactly how awesome it really is.
I thought Godzilla ate up Tukwilla, then he went and ate Renton for dessert…
……and then took a crap in Tacoma.
…at which point Godzilla got completely sick and threw up. That’s how we got Kent.
hahaha @ Lee
No Lee, the crap Godzilla took is the Experience Music Project.
Amazing!
This is incredibly funny. I’m glad Seattle lets me come work in it.
This post is awesome and gave me maximum smiles and work-disrupting giggles. It’s so close to perfect that I have to make one of those nit-picky grammar corrections, so it can be truly, completely perfect. “Seattleites consist entirely on smoked salmon and cougar-meat.” Use ‘subist’ instead of consist as you cannot “consist on” anything. Tx again, LOVE THIS POST!
And to correct myself, that’s SUBSIST…geez.
The best aspect of Portland is that it’s only 2 hours by car from Seattle.
Try 3
If you’re driving 120 MPH. Clearly you don’t drive to Portland very often.
Seattlites noses are so far up in the air they can probably smell Tacoma.
I just read your name as “TacoMan” instead of like, someone from Tacoma. I just wanted you to know that.
That’s why the cappuccino vapor clouds come in handy: they mask that Tacoma smell.
Thanks for the insight, Taco Man…
I will admit that this looks nice.
My hometown is so awesome we don’t need people to riot about it 😛
OK. Now. Lets be honest here. There are two serious issues with this post. 🙂
1) It’s worth mentioning that you took those beautiful photographs on one of the 30 days a year where it’s not raining and it’s clear enough that you can see past the end of the street and actually SEE that big volcano next door. So you’re engaging in a bit of false advertising. 🙂 Although, it’s pretty hard to beat Seattle though in summer. Almost impossible. No bugs. Never hot enough to need an air conditioner.
2) And secondly, you broke the Seattle “Fight-Club” Rule. You’re not supposed to tell people how wonderful it is. Then they move here and ruin it. Especially those ridiculous Californians — who already ruined their own state. 🙂 Tell them to go to Austin instead. :\
Hey, I’m a pesky Californian, but I’m not spoiling it! I love Seattle and treat it with such oh-so tender lovin’ 😀
NEVER hot enough to need a/c? Not quite! The 2 weeks a year when you do need it, I was the happiest & most well-rested person at work every day because I paid extra to have it put in my house. No one else had slept for days because they were too hot and the stores were all sold out of fans. Worth every penny. I had people queuing to stay in my guest rooms every time we had a heatwave.
Spoken like a true Seattle native. As an Arizona native who spent a summer working in Seattle I can attest that it is a waste of money to buy an a/c. Of course, my co-workers did make fun of me for wearing a jacket to work everyday while I was there…so there’s that…
Having visited Seattle for PAX and having taken part in the Magical Mystery Tour there, I’m forced to agree that it is all true! The only bits that need adding are the Sci-Fi museum that has Red Dwarf and Dr Who, and the aquarium – both amazing! Manchester just cannot compare.
Love this!!
I live in Seattle………best kept secret in the world although it is starting to get out….. 🙁
Love it! Though you’re ruining the secret… 😉
Although Seattle is awesome, its not all sugar and spice: it’s got it’s head lodged up its ass politically. And let’s talk about public transportion…oh yeah, we’re about 30 years behind on that…try getting anywhere without a car. Which brings up another point: our most horrible traffic. And that library?..try spending a day there and not get repulsed by the homeless crowd or getting lost in the corkscrew design.
You also forgot to mention the high suicide rate and the high number of serial killers from the area.
Our shit pro teams (except soccer) and the Starbucks CEO that let our NBA go to Oklahoma.
3 mountain ranges? Sorry, only there are only 2. The Cascades and Olympics. Those are still awesome though.
that’s not completely true either,
Most political problems are in Olympia
We don’t need public transportation because everything is delivered by plane
The library was designed that way to scare away the illiterate
The “homeless” are actually actors put there to ward off visitors
The suicide rate is only caused by people being told they had to leave Seattle permanently
Soccer (the REAL football) is the only sport played in the states professionally that is worthwhile anyway
and I am pretty sure you forgot to count the underwater mountain range in the puget sound…. so that makes 3.
Most voters are from Seattle (and surrounding metropolitan area). Your head is truly in the clouds if you think we don’t need a public transportation system.
No, the homeless are homeless, they’re worse than I experienced living in NYC.
While I like playing and watching Soccer (which I agree is the real football, I call american football “hand-egg”) I enjoy watching baseball and basketball live.
There is no Puget Sound mountain range. It is more a fjord system resulting from the last ice age. It runs primarily north-south, carved out as the last glaciers receded.
yes, now I am trolling. I have a strong love-hate relationship with this area. Something only one who lived hear for decades can understand.
ROFLMAO- great response! right on
Have to agree with this one, especially the political comment. It’s as if everyone purchases their pat political- and world-view from the same generic (NPR left) Stepford lifestyle shop (this “tolerant” city can be surprisingly hostile to any dissent from the lockstep, and it is eaten up with the cancer of political correctness). Of course, that’s probably true everywhere, the only difference being in the details and severity–I’d just expect more from Seattle since the populace is alleged to be more educated and intelligent there. Ah well, I love Seattle anyway, weather and all pro sports teams included.
Have you ever lived in another major city like LA, Chicago or New York? Because until you’ve experienced traffic in LA, or the homeless of New York, or the BS of Chicago politics, your views on all these awful things seem a bit provincial.
I grew up in the Chicago area, and moved to Seattle for a year and a half, just having moved back to Chicago for family reasons. I’ve also spent time in NYC and LA. While I was not in Seattle long enough to comment on the political side of things, it seemed like a pretty damned open-minded city. I lived in First Hill and hardly ever drove unless I was going to work on the Eastside…and if that’s what you’re talking about in terms of poor transportation…how do you propose they change that? Should they build a chunnel through Lake Washington? Or would you like a train that goes North or South of the lake?
As far as sports, the Seahawks have been pretty decent in recent years (despite this season) and the Sounders are AWESOME (about to get more awesome with new rivalries in Vancouver and Portland starting up). No comment on the Mariners.
Oh, and in terms of the suicide rate? They’re high, but not even close to the highest…35th out of 51 (including D.C.). Here’s the link: http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/go/state-ranking Turns out Utah is the most depressed state, and Nevada and Alaska are at the highest end of suicides.
I have reported you to “Always describe Seattle as Cloudy Bureau” you will be forced to live somewhere else until you repent.
As to hills for each neighborhood we had too many and flatten a few so out of state folks moving here to drink coffee, enjoy are fine city and write software had a place to live. Including the now very trendy Belltown
http://www.historylink.org/index.cfm?DisplayPage=output.cfm&File_Id=1123
But actually we took out a total of about 60 hills just to make everything smoother…
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Regrading_in_Seattle
Seattle has Bruce Lee in a waiting slumber should we need his protection.
Bwaaaaahahaha AWESOME.
You ser, make me love my city even more.
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This is brilliant. My favorite is the Bellevue caption, but the rest had me giggling. I sent this to my brother-in-law in Kansas just to make him weep.
That’s not the fuselage of the 787. Rather, it’s the 737 being shipped in via rail. 787 fuselages are built in one piece in Japan and are flown to the United States via the Dreamlifter, a modified 747 that can swallow the entire fuselage of its baby brother in one gulp.
…or 35,000 Jews. It’s ok, we keep a low profile and apologize for Seattle’s lack of delis and bagel shops to alert you to our presence.
I never signed a non disclosure agreement when I left..
I grew up in the NW and continue to live here, for now. Seattle is great but has MANY downfalls, most notibly is the absolutely AWFUL climate. 300 days of clouds a year, a constant drip. People are depressed often and rarely look on the bright side. (No pun intended.) I miss Denver, 300 days of sun, seasons…Mountains.
You got it, Patrick! Don’t underestimate the power of the damp & grey to make people depressed, cranky and avert their eyes! Sunshine rocks!
And then there are those of us who moved away from Denver TO Seattle to get away from the gawdawful constant, bright sunlight. It’s like constant laser beams into your brain.
I love the rain and clouds and it never makes me depressed, unlike everyone whining about how cloudy it is in the rainiest city in the country.
OMG me too. Glenwood actually but I got so despondent from all the sun I had to come here.
Unlike Colorado, Seattle keeps a light cloud layer so that God doesn’t burn it down.
There’s no way it’s better than MY hometown: http://www.historiadorio.com.br/images/rocinha8.jpg
In Seattle, the four food groups are pho, hummus with pita, beer, and coffee. This diet is why Seattlelites have the sexiest physiques in the world.
Love you for saying this because it is so true.
two years in Seattle almost convinces me you are right, except of course I’m from Melbourne so I know you are only ‘almost’ right.
i happen to like tacoma. and portland, get over yourselves; yes we notice you’re there too.
Don’t worry you’ll love Seattle when you get out of rehab!
Portland is what Seattle thinks it is…or was…
Thanks for making me laugh! I love Seattle.
Seattle is better than my birthplace (Brooklyn) & the place I was raised (Miami) combined! I love this place! LUCID Jazz Lounge in the U-District has great LIVE Music for Free! Love it!
great pics—too bad most of the year these images are unseen due to the gloom and doom that is Seattle. I was there at Christmas and had to take refuge under an ultra bright lightbulb at the Seatac airport to get my Vitamin D levels up to something other sub zero. And Seattle IS my hometown (I now live on the E Coast). But seriously, great pictures.
Since this post comes out of the corner swinging, I’ll just have to respond back with a couple of swings of my own.
This is kind of a misleading post. Looks as if the photos were only taken during the non-raining season. So that means, this is what Seattle looks like 25% of the time.
Your music scene is lightyears ahead of the rest country and you have Uwajimaya but let’s not get carried away here. Better than the town I grew up in? I respectfully disagree. My 2 years in Seattle would have been better well spent in a dentist chair getting an x-ray of my mouth and have the technician come in and tell me, “We need to retake those”, for 730 days straight but instead I was forced to waste that time waiting for ferries.
That Jetson’s House, which I consider a scar on Seattle’s face, is one of the most hysterical landmarks I have ever seen. I half expected a scientist (lab-coat, clip board and all) to greet me outside the Space Needle and say “Welcome, to the AAAAAAMAZING FUTURE!” Your inability to make pizza, hotdogs or basically anything other than seafood is just mind-blowing. The common Seattleite’s inability to drive in the rain (you guys should really have a handle on that), some how grander inability to drive on a clear sunny day, and your “F*** IT, there’s a quarter inch of snow on the ground, better abandon my car on the interstate” driving technique is terrifying. The roads are modeled after a ball of tangled yarn and what the hell is with the injecting a named street in-between the numbered streets? You can only ride a bike in one direction (down hill) and if you want to get back you’ll have to grab a cab… BUT that’s impossible in the city of Seattle because there are only 6 of them in the entire city!
The only mode of transportation I enjoyed out there was the light rail. Because it took me directly out of Seattle and dropped me off at SEA-TAC. That NDA they tried to make me sign wasn’t necessary. I spit on it and said “Don’t you worry. I’ll actively tell people to never go there.”
In this post you should have posted a sound bite of a hipster scoffing at someone considering to eat bread that isn’t gluten free.
So enjoy your “superior hometown”. I’ll be having a grand old time in my home town Chicago. Riding my bike to and from places, not having that fear of being struck by a driver because “The sun was in their eyes”, eating some of the best food in the country and going to one of our many bars that doesn’t do last call at 12:30am. A place where the women keep their sweatpants at home and I can actually hail a cab.
Just a warning for any of you considering moving to this place. Don’t do it!!! You should definitely visit. Hike Rainier, hang in Ballard, eat some sushi but for the love of everything that is sacred in this world, DON’T LIVE THERE!!!
You sound bitter and I’m guessing it is because you suck at life.
Seattle rain is gorgeous. Seattle is just beautiful.
Wow. You’re kind of a whiner. It’s a joke. Get over yourself.
Yes, because all the Chicago drivers really know how to handle cyclists. (I’ve lived in ChiTown for 3 years now.)
Seattle is better than Chicago because we understand snark. You missed the point of his post.
So, so true. I’m from Chicago, and lived in Seattle for a little while…when walking and riding those hills, I’d never felt so healthy and in shape! And his comment on food is pretty ridiculous, too. Yes, Chicago does have some world-class chefs and restaurants, but does it have late-night happy hour for food and drinks? And I have had more than a few friends get hit by riding their bicycles throughout Chicago. You’re lucky as hell if a road has a real bike-lane. This guy sounds like a pretentious yuppie from Lincoln Park or Old Town who works in the Financial District.
Seattleites can drive in the rain its the transplants that can’t.
Name another major city that has as many hills as us and gets snow.
With ya on the cabs and last call part….. lalalalame.
Seems like you wussed out, only the strong survive here.
Pittsburgh
730 days straight of waiting for ferries?
plainly, that means you didn’t even live in seattle.
thus, you were targeted for non-admittance status during your brief term here.
you probably only got a d-level clearance – which means you never found our grass fed beef burger joints, our warm and dimly lit drinking nooks with world class bourbon offerings, and you most assuredly never pre-funked a yacht party before a huskies game.
this also explains why you, subsequently, spent 2 years looking, in vain, for a decent hotdog…
enjoy biking chi-town. minus 37 degrees is super fun…
A few thoughts…
Don’t be sour Chicago didn’t come up with the Needle. Soon Chicago will try and build one, only to learn that it will not ever meet the standards of Seattle’s genius.
Speaking of genius, have you had a Cream Cheese hotdog?
As far as pizza goes…you can take your monstrosity deep dish pizza along with high cholesterol and poor physique. Seattle flies pizza to Italy during shortages since we are the only ones who know how to make a true pizza.
Those bad drivers…not from Seattle.
Seattlites are in good shape…it takes a superior gene pool to be able to bike back up our hills.
Don’t be frustrated that you don’t understand the logic of our streets…soon Chicago will learn.
Seriously? You live in Chicago and you try and play this? I might have bought it if you lived in New York or Philadelphia or San Francisco, maybe but NOT Chicago — the place they call the Windy City? You can ride a bike there for the 7 days it isn’t so hot and humid you turn into a limp rag or cold and snowing that your bike chain freezes. Next time you want to go mano a mano with Seattle, change your hometown first!
Did we not server your latte at the right temperature? Such a bitter response. We’re proud of our quirky “little” city. Be proud of yours too, but don’t waste your time or ours bashing ours.
The only thing sadder than someone claiming that ” makes the best pizza in the world and it’s vastly superior to the pizza from “, is when ANYONE claims that Chicago style pizza is even “pizza”, much less edible.
Best I can figure is that some Bears fan (da’ Bears) decided that he couldn’t get fat enough eating an honest pizza, unless he added 20 layers of cholesterol based ingredients.
Chicago??Chicago!?! After spending the 3 worst years of my life in that hell hole I’ve never been happier in my life in Seattle. There are maybe 7 days a year you can actually go outside in Chicago…so unbelievably cold, way too hot in the summer and there is no such thing as fall or spring. I HATED it. I don’t own a car in Seattle and bike and use public transit to get around everywhere with no problem. This is the first January of my entire life that I’ve actually been able to go outside and go biking without nearly freezing to death. Oh yeh it’s cloudy? Boo hoo, the temperate is fantastic year round and the rain never gets in the way of any run or bike ride. I have yet to even use an umbrella. Seattle is the best!!
No one uses an umbrella….it’s Seattle. We leave that shit to the Portland hipsters and don our Marmot/Columbia/North Face/Patagonia/Mountain Hardwear/etc. raincoats in a variety of bright colors.
From an Everett resident, Seattle is the most Boss city ever. Long live the Emerald City!
If Seattle is the Emerald City, then Toto was a slug.
so far it all seems to be true.
Yeah. About the Union Dock Workers. They actually went to Andy’s Diner to get “lunch” and never made it back to work. Oh how I miss Seattle. Pics are beautiful. Should be a coffee table book.
Andy’s is a Chinese restaurant now…bummer!
As a Seattle native, I agree with this entirely.
Except, I have to shame us a bit – truth is, our brother to the north, Vancouver, is just like us except slightly better in every way (except their university is uglier!).
Nahh! I posit that the two cities are in many ways very different; also, my opinion is that Seattle is in some ways better than Vancouver (for example, Vancouver’s built environment, i.e., architecture and streetscape, is *significantly* more generic and sterile throughout the city and suburbs).
Seattle and Vancouver may be nearly identical in size and climate, with some geographic similarities, but they have their own very distinct identities and specific characteristics and geographic details. People outside the region think of them as twins and don’t know the difference when the latter subs for the former in film and tv (Seacouver), but we all know better.
Both cities have pros and cons, and I’d say both come out equal if different in quality. But let’s not forget, both cities are bigger and better than Portland (nice little town, but why settle when you’re so close…).
(I don’t really have a beef with Portland, I just know they’re sensitive, kinda like Atlanta, the original useless, “me-too” city. Makes it fun to tweak them. At least Portland is a moderately desirable locale–Atlanta, not even remotely.)
Vancouver is actually a several magnitudes larger than Seattle. Nearly 4x the population at 2.3 million.
I like Portland. What Chicago is to New York, Portland is to Seattle, sorta (and more accurately; Seattle is to Vancouver). Geographically and environmentally similar, they differ on the social and economic level.
@go gadget go Vancouver’s population is 578,041 according to the 2006 Canadian Census, whereas Seattle’s is 608,660. You looked at the numbers for the Vancouver metropolitan area (Vancouver plus the surrounding suburbs) and compared them to the numbers for Seattle’s city limits. Seattle actually has a larger metropolitan area at 3.4 million. The disparity in census years discredits the 30,000 difference in population since in four years Vancouver could’ve easily gained that much. They’re roughly equal.
We’re missing some cool stuff that you have, like the market and the U district, but we also missed Nirvana. It’s about even.
If Portland is our little sister, then Vancouver is our little brother. What is up with the smell of urine adorning all that is downtown Vancouver?
This is nothing short of genius. Truly you are from Seattle. Name a product…it was founded here.
Seattle is to Portland as New York is to New Jersey. Think I’m wrong? Go to a gas station and try to pump your own gas 🙂
Also, we have famous monsters on the city payroll, in lieu of construction workers.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/rocketjaz/6295729912/
We were smart enough to get rid of the NBA before it became so lame.
Actually, Portland’s always reminded me of Tacoma more than Seattle.
U R kewllll!
Oh gods – You have officially gone viral.
HILARIOUS stuff. The clouds being formed by cappuccino steam… brilliant.
almost as nice as vancouver
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Um, yeah, this is fucking rad. I live in belltown and wouldnt leave this place for all the money in the world….instead, I would buy it, kick all the bums out, move all the buildings closer to the water and have awesome gatherings with the 5 million people I have yet to meet. Nice work on this.
I got tired of how special Seattle was and moved away. I’m happier now.
Hee hee… working on that one myself. Good riddance GREY & RAIN!
Seattle averages less rain per year than New York City, New York City, Atlanta, Boston, Baltimore, Portland, Maine, and Jacksonville, Florida, and isn’t even on the list of top 15 rainiest cities in America.
So, so funny. And I make no argument against any of it, as my hometown is in Jersey.
Hilarious! I didnt even grow up there but this post makes me miss Seattle
We also have pirates thank you very much
Favorite line…”Ferries…Yeah, that’s how we get to 7-11″
Hot dog, I love ferry boats.
Love this. Seattle is more than anyone could ask for.
It would be more awesome if you could simply get a decent pizza. Seriously, Pagliacci is dollar for dollar, the most overpriced food/quality product on the planet. I love virtually everything about Seattle, but am seriously stunned at how terrible the pizza is….
have you been to serious pie?
This blog is very un-Seattle like!!! You should be too cool to post something like this. Seattle folks know Seattle is better because they are enlightened beyond caring. Leave it for the junior high humor that exists in Portland.
Great photos of Seattle and the surrounding area but the photos of the Boeing planes are the 737 not the 787. The 787 is a composite body and is not green.
In Portland you can watch naked women dance while enjoying a cocktail. In Seattle? Not so much.
Nobody here wants to go to the strip clubs. Hot girls are everywhere but there.
I love it when they turn on the big sprinklers to fake rain and scare away the Canadians.
Bruce Lee was an UW graduate, therefore we all know martial art. No one can fuck with us! 😛
Awesome!
You forgot the Fremont Troll! No other city in the world has it’s *very own troll*, two stores tall and sitting under the Aurora ridge, eating a real Volkswagon bug!
Seattle is also the only city cool enough to have it’s own superheroes.
Chief Sealth let Mother Nature begin here!
Best comment EVER!!!!!!!!!
…wait a minute i live in la.
No Portland hate please. Both cities are lovely. Vancouver B.C. is too. We should all have city-citizenship in all three regardless of which one it is that we call home. Seattle is bliss and so is Portland and Vancouver. San Francisco… not so much… but it has that crazy energy border towns have. 😛
“…border town…” LMAO!
Cascadians unite!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Republic_of_Cascadia
its going down…..
But then everyone from both Portland and Seattle come to the Bay Area and find out quickly what they got wrong. We made y’all. YEEEEEEEE!!! Also, Seattleites have tried to tell me that they invented “hella.” Don’t be ignant.
Lot of nice pictures there, but that hideous monstrosity of the downtown SPL branch kinda ruins your argument 😛
But, but, but… Okay, you win.
You’ve even got a beautiful neighbour in Vancouver.
However – do you have any decent pubs?
We still play Bball in Oregon
You are correct. The NBA, least interesting pro sport, maintains a disproportionate presence in smaller, less significant markets such as PDX. Note, for example, they abandoned both Seattle and Vancouver, much nicer and more significant cities than Portland, for Oklahoma City and Memphis.
…BTW, “Shawn Kemp’s son”, have you met any of your countless half-siblings scattered all across this great land?!
Yeah but you guys are watching Seattle players (i.e. B. Roy and Jamal Crawford)
Sheet, I realize this is a joke but some poor slob in Kansas is probably thinking this reaffirms her life goal to get to Portland or Seattle where everything will just click into order for her–naturally. To that slob I say be very wary of this part of the country. The people and the opportunities aren’t that great. Do some research and visit at various times of the year. My advice is go big first and then if you don’t like that go fizzle out out in the drizzle in the NW. Good Luck!
What an excellent photo tour and explanation of Seattle!
Seattle also has a big part of my family and, that really makes it better than your hometown.
Tongue planted firmly in cheek…
You forget to mention Swedish Hospital where everyone in Seattle was born.
You got that right. Anyone who would have a kid in Harborview should be convicted of child abuse.
But someday maybe u should come visit Indonesia..
We don’t have a great big buildings and fabulous as your place but we have a wealth of nature that is so beautiful and amazing scenery that big city don’t have 🙂
Something that money cant buy or even build up..
But someday i should visit your hometown too.. To see how beautiful and great your hometown..
nice pic..
i love indonesia
the weather and the friendly people
And Nascar’s for sissies who can’t handle Hydroplanes!
Seattle is the second best city in Washington. The best one is where the sun shines almost 270 days a year. It offers many of the amenities of Seattle other than the sound, but there are over 100 lakes within 30 miles of it. People still say hello to people they walk by on the streets. Traffic jams last 30 minutes in the morning and afternoon and they delay you for about 10 minutes at the most. You don’t need over $100K salaries to afford a decent home. Those of you that live in Washington will know the city I am talking about. I prefer to keep it a secret so it stays like it is.
Lived there once. Was not an experience I’d care to repeat, and lacked diversity in every respect. Sorry, Bill – Spokane’s just not for all of us (though you do have us beat on the traffic jam situation).
You gotta be joking me right? Spokane is a SH*t hole. What else do they have that seattle has? They have no jobs, no pride in home ownership, no self respect, no activities that Seattle doesn’t, no decent food.
There are NO 100k+ jobs there so I hope you dont need one to get by. Housing is supply and demand, housing is cheap there because nobody wants to live there, and even if they did want to, where would they work? Retail or fast food? Maybe construction? They also have more fast food per capita than any city in America, so there clearly aren’t a lot of good looking people either.
Please dont call your rolling hills mountains.
Eastern WA is a dump.
Me thinks you speak of Spokane, but only because of the first comment is derivative of the animosity that is common of eastern Washingtonians towards west. But I might be wrong.
Where else, he mentioned sunshine, all the other cities in Washington with “amenities” have nearly identical weather to Seattle being all clumped together along the sound.
If it’s Spokane they left out the part where you can’t drive anywhere for the other 95 days because of all the fucking snow.
I live there too. It has its decent qualities, but I think the reason I can survive there is because of my frequent visits to Seattle. 🙂
Don’t diss Spokane food though, there are quite a few fab joints, as well as some AMAZING coffee shops, I do prefer the Seafood in Seattle though.
I love the elk crossing sign (have never seen one there in 30+ years BWAAA) right before the sunniest city in Washington, and it’s on the way to my favorite place on the Olympic Peninsula, Sol Duc Hot Springs!!! My son and I took Flat Stanley there. FS chilled and had a cheeseburger at the grill – next to the 3 hot pools and one fabulous cold pool. Best back and forth temperature-torture you can put yourself through! Flat Stanley didn’t play that s**t though. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah…we were talking about Seattle. I digress…whew – I need a vente frappe, gonna go get one five minutes from home…in any direction. Oh, and GO HAWKS!!! And for you Bronco, 49ers. Ariz. Cardinals fans, South Kitsap Cheerleaders could kick all your butts!
Very nice photos. If I could convince my wife to move I would be gone in a minute. Seattle is overcrowded, way overpriced and the people are pretentious and rude. I have been here 25 years and that is about 24 years too long.
Agreed, I lived there for 18 years and had more than my fill. I’ll take the sunny Bay Area any day of the week. Seattle can have it’s yearly two weeks of absolutely beautiful weather, I’ll take my daily dose. Most Californians believe the hype, go ahead and move up there and enjoy your disappointment.
I can’t hear over the sound of awesomeness here in Seattle
Awesome! Check out this video, on the same theme: “Seattle WA, The Best City in the World”.
http://charbeck.net/blog/video/seattle-wa-the-best-city-in-the-world-video/
Great!!!!
Agree with you mostly but no matter what, it will always be a poor man’s Vancouver…
Yes, Seattle is gorgeous. But the people? Beneath the lovely cloudy vapors lies a very homogenous and milquetoast population.
Oh, I completely agree. Seattle is a beautiful city, but in my nearly 9 years here I find the people to just be…bleh. I am a transplanted east coaster, so maybe I’m just used to friendlier people (even though everyone thinks we’re rude!). The Seattle freeze is definitely in effect here, and I don’t like it one bit. I’m established here now with my career and family, otherwise I’d leave in a heartbeat. The views would still be here when I came to visit, but I wouldn’t have to deal with boring, passive-aggressive people every day.
Too funny! I learned so much about Seattle, my day is complete!
Every word is true.
Wait….so we have NO synagogues?
Since I moved here from NYC, I have hated Seattle with the fire of a thousand suns. I clicked through preparing to hate this, but it made me laugh until I fell down. I also now understand why I got brained with a hot dog a few months back. Y’all really ought to put something about that in the welcome packet.
Bruce Lee likes Seattle better than you town!!!!
You forgot to mention Seattle has the world’s best french fries, at Dick’s.
ive been told of a magnificent welcome sign that states… “welcome to seattle.. we’re better than you!”
Love the pictures. Love the captions. I am fortunate to live in one part of Seattle that is 15 minutes away from everything! From downtown, Ballard, Alki, Lake Washington, Boeing field, and the mall. Yeah, Seattle is wonderful and yeah, Seattle has its problems. Running a business is a challenge, traffic can be a huge issue, the weather is just something you get used to. We have the threat of earthquake but virtually no tornadoes, no hurricanes, summers not too hot and winters not to cold (usually-but as with everywhere there are exceptions to every rule.) When it does snow, yeah, it gets crazy-but you try to drive these hills in the snow, even with chains. And, because of the hills, mountains and convergence zones, it can literally be clear at my house and 1 mile up the street, be snowing. It is just the way it is. Seattle is wonderful. I believe this post was meant to brag about some things, and per the captions, bitch about some of the others. We are not perfect, we never claim to be, but we definitely have a lock on the best and most beautiful city in the Northwest.
Having left Seattle for NYC, I can confirm thid is true, you must sign a waiver when you leave. They also install a microchip into your brain just to be safe.
I wouldn’t be so braggy about Starbucks.
I wish that had been true about Bellevue-ites. You should create an initiative.
Gorgeous pics. Seattle is truly a beautiful place although it has nothing on NYC. I actually could get arrested from the post because it’s illegal to even allow the two in the same conversation, that’s how far apart they are in awesomeness.
PS- Portland kicks ass.
You are becoming legen-(wait for it)-dary among my Seattle Facebook friends for this. Thanks for lots of chuckles! Our hyperbole in the Northwest is better than everyone else’s.
Awesome – truly hilarious. Good Lord, do I miss Seattle!!
So true! Seattle is THE BEST hometown! (Despite it’s awful local government.) And for all of you who don’t like it here: shut up, pack up & move away!
No.
Some say Seattle-ites receive a monthly stipend from the Governor as a bonus for choosing to live here. But everyone refuses to accept the money because that would be crass. The 12-hours of sunset is enough.
Great post.
For the Accuracy-freaks coming out of the woodwork, I have four words for you: hy-per-bol-e. Sheesh.
Really. If you’re taking this seriously at all, you probably shouldn’t be allowed to live anywhere without a guardian. Born and raised in Seattle and love to visit, but sold my soul for SoCal sunshine.
In Seattle you can paddle your kayak to go get tacos.
Hopefully this blog gets more people (Californians) to move to Seattle instead of filling up Portland ;P
j/k I love you too Emerald City from Portland with love.
I’m glad there are others who feel the same about our delicious city.
Okay, that’s some funny stuff. Too bad the Sonics had to leave… We could’ve had Kevin Durant! lol
Honestly, Seattle is super overrated. I went there once and not only was it raining but nobody had an umbrella to lend me! Have yet to navigate the downtown area without paying at least $7 in bus fare. Pretty mountains do not make a “good hometown”.
Thank you!
My hometown is New York City. You lose, motherfuckers.
My colon is cleaner than your home town. And Derek Jeter is overrated, motherfucker.
New York is like a rich loser who can’t get laid at home, so he has to pay for it at other places!!! “A-rod, Ichiro, Freddy Garcia, Raul” We still got the better end of the deal with Buhner. It’s ok you guys couldn’t get past 3rd base so you picked up Seattle’s sloppy seconds. Anytime you want to hop on one of Boeing’s planes and come visit our far superior city feel free. Just make sure you tell people “The Bone sent ya” or we might send you a little south to take a trip down the Green River.
And why is everyone hating on Tacoma, when we have those “horse whispers” up in Enumclaw. You sick Fucks. Seattle would be more than happy to buy your plane tickets to New York. Maybe their mounted police can give you a proper New York beating.
P.S. Bones
My truck payment is going to be a little late, do to the fact I somehow miss placed my wallet at Hempfest…
You are a total knob.
This type of smug, self absorbed arrogance is everything that’s wrong with Seattle. This kid has obviously never lived anywhere else or he would know that people on the East coast can’t point Seattle out on the map….cause they don’t care
I can’t point New York out on a map. See what I did there, Einstein?
I’m actually rather amazed that the EMP wasn’t in there. Makes even the library look aesthetically pleasing by comparison.
This is the greatest blog post of all time
This is a life-affirming post.
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FALSE: The Puget Sound is actually not a sound. It was misnamed. But Seattle is still cool.
Thanks Eric! Love this!
Portland is Seattles meth addicted, haggard old hooker.
Portland gets molested each year, on Thanksgiving, in the guest bedroom by Tacoma.
It is true that when I moved I had to sign a disclosure and I have obeyed said closure.
You all Seattle borns- live on happy pills. You all lie to yourself about how great the clouds look.
Beautiful city- very depressing weather.
🙂
Seattle, nirvana of the self congratulatory.
We get our pizzas delivered by 787 sea planes. They make it in the plane en route.
Boom. Gametime.
i just wonderring in there… hufh
.KEvery word is true!!! This is exactly why I love and miss Seattle!
(Posted from po-dunk Kentucky where they have no teeth, no education, no mountains 🙁 …and definitely nothing delivered by seaplane.)
That was totally awesome! I cannot wait till I finally make it there to live!
My favorite is the noon photo with the reference to sunset all day long . . . . everyday, all day long . . . . for months . . . . and months. it’s abeautiful photo, though.
awesome
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I lived in Seattle for 11 years…about 10 years too long! thank goodness for So. Cal sunshine!!! miss the green, some restaurants & my Seattle friends…but have facebook to stay in touch…enjoy the grey and the rain for me…give me SUNSHINE 360 days of the year!
Of course it looks nice! Those pics where taken on a rare sunny day! There is literally no sun and it really does rain all the time! So for that Seattle sucks and that is why I left! Especially being from CA. Sure if you are from there it doesn’t bother you- you don’t know anything else!
Except Seattle wishing it was San Francisco .. 😛
For those complaining about the lack of good pizza in Seattle, go straight to The Northlake Tavern ~ on Northlake Avenue, near Ivars. It’s awesome!!
Seattle is my hometown and I love it; in all it’s pretentious, hyperbolic glory! 🙂 If you can’t take your coffee black and your skies grey you won’t like Seattle. She is quirky and cool, down-home snootsville and you’ve gotta love her for all her uniqueness and nonconventionality. Seattleites are a wacky bunch, but we can laugh at ourselves and our kookie kitsch.
Whoever did this, thanks for making me laugh! 🙂
Love and miss Seattle like a long lost lover… I appreciate the pictures and captions. Accuracy was not the target for this. Only getting a discussion going.
Yes Seattle is the absolute best. This post is for everyone I meet who says “ew, it rains a lot in Seattle” or “I’d be so depressing to live in Seattle” or “I hear that Seattle has a high suicide rate”.
Why all this fuss about irrelevant cities like Seattle? I say mark it ground zero and start over.
Irrelevant? LOL. Kids these days and their glib ignorance. You probably typed that using software that was invented and designed in Seattle.
Seattle is named for a Native American Chief. Suck on that Milwaukie
was born in texas; moved everywhere; ended up in seattle for 6 years. been back nd forth between seattle; texas; and los angeles….cali is warm…. but way more busy than my home. ive been in seattle the longest outta every state and city ive lived in; and i jus turned 21. seattle is a great place for life options.
As an ex-pat from the Pacific Northwest, I LOVED this! Thank you so much. It made me homesick!
To the haters- If you can’t take a joke or understand hyperbole, we’re glad you left and are never coming back.
I’m living in a gorgeous Italian city now, and yet, I still think the beauty of our city rivals some of the better known most beautiful places in the world. On a clear summer day, when the water is shining, and the trees are lush, and the mountains are out – I think it is hard to find anywhere more beautiful. Maybe as beautiful, but not more. Thanks!
So true! Thank you Heather!
Seattle has a Stanley Cup. 1917
I’ve been to 18 different major cities in the U.S. and lived in 5 of them. All of these place were somewhat nice but, none of them come close to Seattle as far as I’m concerned.
Seattle is a place where the residents complains about the rain on a winter time and complains about the heat on a summer time. Am I right, or wrong?
Completely wrong. You obviously don’t know anything about Seattle. We dont complain about rain here, there’s no point.
Thank you for showing us on the east coast what we’ve been missing.
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I have always wanted to visit, now I definitely will.
These pictures clearly explain why my girlfriend is merciliessly asking that we move to Seattle. Apparently,she believes that Seattle > NYC, and after seeing your pics and reading your descriptions (lakes and mountain ranges!), she may have a valid point. Thanks for posting the pictures, and allowing her arguments to creep evermore into my head.
Lovely! I really like the city shots.
Gonna have to disagree with you. I’m from Detroit, and that city is pretty rad, too.
Ugh I love seattle, there’s no fast food around, it’s clean, hilly, and surrounded by mountains and ocean.
Crossing my fingers to get into dental school there!
Great!
Yes. My Hometown SUCKS. That’s why I’m moving to Seattle in June 😀
I’ll see you there, i’m moving in august!
Miss you, Seattle! We desert rats can always remember wistfully…
As a native of Philadelphia, I think it’s cute how other cities think they are superior to us. 🙂 However, I do have to say that I did visit Seattle for a work conference recently and thought that the downtown was quite nice … except for the freezing rain that fell EVERY DAY and was so cold that it quite literally froze my internal organs on the inside my body. It took a few cups of overpriced sugary coffee to thaw them before I could bend in the middle. I suppose that’s why you invented the stuff …
Philly doesn’t even compare to Seattle. You just happened to visit during an unusual time, because they don’t usually have freezing rain, and certainly not everyday!. Where did you get your coffee from anyway, because they do have good coffee just about everywhere you go. Maybe you just don’t know how to order coffee???
Hahaha this is a fantastic post. I particularly liked “Seattle invented bricks and mortar in the 5th century BC. Then in the 20th century AD, it invented Amazon.com and made them obsolete.” and “Those clouds are made from the vapor of 3 million cappuccinos.”
Well done and congrats on FP.
NB. I’d just like to say that I like MY hometown too! xx
I am from Toronto, and visited a friend in Seattle this past November. I only spent 4 days there, but I did fall in love with it. Being an avid-coffee drinker, I was impressed with the sheer volume of coffee shops. I could have spent the entire duration of my trip at Pike Place, and I almost did. I’ll be back in February, so we’ll see if it’s as magical the second time around!
Haha, this is hilarious! Kinda has the same tone as the “Chuck Norris Facts.” 😉
I liked this post long before Freshly Pressed found it. What do I win?
I’m still laughing. You ripped Seattle a new ass, but man, your pictures are freakin awesome.
val
http://valentinedefrancis.wordpress.com
Seattle gave the world, Soundgarden and Steve Largent….end of conversation.
You may be right, my friend…
Great shots!
Love your pictures of Seattle! Very cool city…never been but want to visit.
What an awesome tribute to Seattle…
— In Seattle and luvin’ it
Wonderful! Thank you for this. We just spent New Years Eve in Seattle and had a splendid time!
I’ve never been to Seattle. I will put it on my To-Do List. It looks amazing!
Haha! Seattle is nice, but I’ll never consent that it’s better than San Francisco.
Last August I left Seattle after 15 years – back to Chicago. What the hell was I thinking?! Lived in NW Capitol Hill, worked in Eastlake – walked to work everyday with a Space Needle, Olympics, Queen Anne, seaplane, Lake Union, houseboats and sailboats backdrop. Sometimes, here on the prairie I squint my eyes and imagine clouds are mountains. I actually go to Starbucks here, never did in Seattle – makes me feel close.
I’m coming back to you soon my love! You’re in my bones. This is a lovely (and also for me, somewhat heartbreaking) post.
I had the same feeling after I left Seattle (lived there for seven years) and moved back to New England. I actually had dreams about Seattle I missed it so much. Corny, I know, but it really was like a heart-breaking split with a lover.
Wow this is amazing! Your photos are just gorgeous and not to mention I loved reading all of your captions 😀
I never really thought about Seattle as a place I’d like to visit but you sure changed my mind!
As for some hometown glory, the first (and only thing right now actually) I can think of is that Kate Winslet is from here…? How did I do?
Haha! Genius post. Great photos too. Brilliant!!
LMFAO…i like this post and found it entertaining, even though I’ve never been to Seattle and would never bother going there (a place where it rains every day?No thank you!!)
…BTW, my hometown boasts a 7-11 with a waterfront view, a main street that ends in a harborfront with mega-yachts, one traffic light and one of the best-restored collection of colonial houses in the country. 🙂
It doesn’t rain every day. In fact, it rarely rains at all during long 2-3 month stretches in the summer.
And that is just the tip of the iceberg… Seattle’s amazing-ness doesn’t stop there!
LMAO!! Seattle is rad. And so are you.
Thanks for spoiling the Seattle secret….REALLY, folks – it rains here 364 days of the year…these photos must have all been taken on that one nice day…
Your town does seem better than mine.
This is class, and anywhere with a good Starbucks beats my home town 🙂
Lovely pictures. Especially the one of the bridge. Even though I might never move there, I might consider visiting Seattle.
I am from the Pacific Northwest…I love seeing beautiful photos of the greatest city in the world! 🙂
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