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Uganda Leftovers: Down with OPP (Other People’s Pictures)

Remember how I said I managed to thoroughly not-capture the essence and character of Uganda in my photos?

My colleague did a much better job than I did. Here's a dude returning home from fishing all day.

You see a lot people carrying big loads in inefficient ways like this. Apparently they tried to install a proper bus system, with departure times and everything, in Kampala but the minibus drivers protested and it was scrapped.

All the travel guides said not to swim in Lake Victoria due to urethra-bugs, but the Ugandans were doing it.

Either my colleague photoshopped this, or Uganda had the sepia-filter on that day.

There's a lot of dilapidated, abandoned equipment hanging out in Uganda. It's like a more keepin-it-real version of Hustle and Flow

My colleague took lots of pictures like these. 'Their bodies!' she moaned whenever we were within zoom distance of a beach

This is the market where they yelled 'White people!' as soon as we entered. It's like a Wal-Mart greeter, only facing the other way.

We didn't know what most of this stuff was, so we mostly bought bananas.

This was at the zoo. I love how the hyena and the lawnmower-man are both utterly indifferent to each other.

This is the president. I understand why he had more election posters up than anyone else, but I don't understand why he's wearing a sombrero in all of them.

Here's another market in another city. Bananas, please.

Don't worry, they signed a release form.

This was like the CostCo of Uganda. People were selling grains and other basics in bulk.

Shopping looks like it takes all day there. Nothing is labeled, the stores are constantly understocked, etc.

It makes you realize how much more productive our economies are simply for their reliability.

Reacting to the capriciousness of the Ugandan retail sector, my colleague said, 'But how do people plan their day?!'

Uganda has like the fourth-lowest median age on Earth. I cannot express how fucking *everywhere* the kids are.

No seriously, between the breakfast buffet and the dinner buffet, all we ate was bananas.

Qaddafi supported a bunch of programs and infrastructure in Kampala, so hella stuff is named after him.

This is how entire families get around Kampala. Female passengers sit to the side, men to the front or back.

They also serve as taxis. I've been told you'll be openly laughed at on the street if you sit with the wrong orientation on the back.

The retail sector in Kampala is a bit more developed than in the countryside, but not much more. The only foreign companies are gas stations and mobile providers.

See? Facing sideways. If she was facing front, we would have pointed and laughed out the car window. Integration!

I think my colleague was going for something artsy and metaphorical here. She probably stood there for like 45 minutes waiting for a dove to land, achieving maximum poignancy.

Even her photos from our hotel look better than mine! Ugh, I need a banana.

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This is the view from my hotel room in Kampala

I was in Uganda for work, which means I spent most of the week looking at the country out of windows

Hotel, car, office

Even the sunrises were spectated

What does the chair mean?!

After working all week, we went to Entebbe, on Lake Victoria, for the weekend

And checked out a chimpanzee sanctuary. Where 43 apes growled at us and one threw rocks.

Everything's smaller in Africa, even me.

The coolest thing about Entebbe is the monkeys. They're everywhere!

They're so tame they're practically houseguests

We went to the zoo, which had a bunch more monkeys, only the less tame, more existentially despairing ones

If you want a treatise on the hubris of man, read the Wikipedia entry for Lake Victoria. Say, here's a vast freshwater lake with a wide variety of unique fish life. Let's introduce an invasive predatory species into it!

They're like squirrels, just everywhere as hell.

The lake is significantly less full of fish than it used to be, but that doesn't mean it's empty.

As long as no one trains the monkeys to catch the predator-fish, Uganda should be fine.

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